As I reflect on 2023, my biggest takeaway centers on expectations. And how poor self-esteem has dangerously fed into passive, unrealistic assumptions. Expecting people to inherently “do the right thing” without direct communication. Assuming every project would run smoother than it did. Time and again, I set myself up for letdowns by not checking my expectations.
I know so many Dealer Principals who run the same losing pattern. We broadly expect turning profits to be easy. We expect for customers to be loyal without effort, and for employees to remain self-motivated despite poor culture. When people let us down, we fault them rather than reflecting on the unchecked assumptions that distorted our perspective.
In my own case, underneath these unchecked expectations lurked an unstable sense of self-worth. As I tell my podcast co-host Christian, low self-esteem fuels passive expectations. So when something goes awry despite contrary warning signs, I take it as a personal indictment rather than a simple unpredictable outcome. This confirmation bias erodes self-belief further, creating a vicious cycle of narrow pessimism.
Christian nails how avoiding difficult truths relates to this cycle. When uncomfortable realities loom but go unaddressed, it brews stress and passive-aggression within myself. Rather than raise issues directly in pursuit of efficiency, I swallow frustrations only for them to resurface later multiplied.
So, for 2024, I’m applying renewed intention on two fronts – heightening expectations of MY accountable outcomes rather than unearned external wins, alongside fostering self-compassion to short-circuit the self-blame game. I recently added a fourth quadrant to my Leadership Scale model examining the dangers of high locus of control without intentionality… producing the dreaded “martyr” syndrome! I don’t wish that fate on anyone. This meticulous look inward has revealed where suppressed beliefs restricted my leadership and life. Now, in tune with these core drivers, real change can come.
If this transparent glimpse into my personal growth resonates and you seek to equip for positive evolution in your own dealership’s culture and accountability next year, reach out and book a free 15-minute leadership strategy session. I built Chris Collins Inc.’s consulting services to diagnose dysfunctional patterns and forge an upward path in any automotive service context. Let’s connect!
